Earlier this week, my team went through a day and a half management training. It surfaced a bunch of things that I've learned about managing people over the last several years. I made some notes and thought I'd share them here.

1/ Some managers see their role as being the one that needs to smooth things over. This is the wrong approach. As Karl Marx said, it's best to "sharpen the contradictions." Bring the conflict up to the surface so everyone can see it and deal with it.

2/ When managing managers, sometimes the most important thing you can do is help them make the hard decisions they already know they need to make. Give them the support, safety, and clarity to execute on the hard stuff.

3/ Self-awareness and general awareness are two of the most crucial attributes of a leader. You have to know how you're being perceived and you have to know the issues on the team. You have to be in touch with the 'water cooler talk'. You have to make sure people understand that you know what's going on in their worlds. A clueless leader is the worst kind of leader.

4/ Create a habit of regularly expressing unsolicited gratitude to your reports. This is rocket fuel from an engagement and loyalty perspective.

5/ Use the writer/editor analogy when thinking about how much leverage you're getting from your reports. If you're doing a lot of writing, you're not getting enough leverage.

6/ Giving feedback is a muscle. When you do it a lot, it's easy. When you don't do it a lot, it's hard. Make giving feedback a regular part of the way you interact with your team.

7/ In a conflict, try to understand the other person's argument so well that you can make their argument for them with more clarity than they can. Don't make your argument until you can do this.